While in the bay area, I was lucky enough to do a writing workshop with the great Anne Lamott (Bird by Bird, Operating Instructions…)

Here are her 10 lessons on writing:

1. Write badly for 20 min every day
2. Nobody cares if you write another word. So YOU have to care
3. Get a partner to read 4 pages every month. “A partner is like a birth coach.”
4. Write what you love to come upon: Memoir? Fiction? Romance? Short stories?
5. Tell the truth; all you have to do is change people’s heights and they’ll never recognize themselves
6. Have a little sense of humor
7. Wear out the voice of self-loathing by taking action
8. Use a tape recorder/voice memo to get things down. If you can’t remember, start with holidays, and birthdays
9. Blocked? You might be empty because you’re trying too hard. Take a break and fill up with other forms of creativity and inspiration
10. Publication is not the lifelong seal of approval you have been craving. It’s not in publishing; the pay-off is in the writing.

Your friend is in a really hard place. It could be heartbreak, a cancer diagnosis, a betrayal, a child is sick, a parent is dying, a legal mess, or they made a painful mistake. Whatever the reason, it is causing deep suffering.

What do you do?

When I received a terminal diagnosis, my family and friends pulled me through the unimaginable. Every person’s journey is different, but what all crises have in common is that they are made lighter, together.

Download My Free Guide

This resource will help you to be a good friend in tough times.

Download Here

 

---

This content appears in my forthcoming memoir, Fierce Joy.  It is everything I know about bravery as a woman, a partner, a parent, a leader, an athlete, an activist, and a brainstem tumor survivor. Reviewers say it’s fast-paced and beautiful and funny. I say, don’t forget that it’s a love story! This is the memoir I’ve been working on in the pre-dawn darkness every day for the past two and half years. It’s about showing up real in life and at work and what gets in the way, namely perfectionism. It’s about love and death and living life to its fullest. It’s about choosing joy over fear and brave over perfect. It’s about looking underneath our fears to find unlimited joy. It’s about how our striving, saving, and performing to do things the “right” way is making it impossible for us to show up real. It’s about how Fear has become a main character in our lives, and a dangerous obstacle to real change.

Learn more, read an excerpt or pre-order Fierce Joy here.

Here’s to Marilyn French Caldwell on Mother’s Day!

A quick story: For my 16th birthday, Mom took me to see the tennis greats Steffi Graf and Martina Navratilova play. When Steffi won, I assumed it was time to go home. Mom had a different idea.

“Quick!” she said. “They’re signing autographs!” At courtside, Mom pushed me through a crowd of determined tennis fans.

“Let her through!” Mom said, pushing harder.

“What’s your name?” asked Steffi Graf, as she signed my poster.

“Marilyn!” Mom shouted from the back of the crowd. Then she laughed.”
–from Fierce Joy, a memoir. Out May 15.

This is the thing about my mother: she is passionate about sports, especially tennis, and she can laugh at herself easily, joyfully. Happiest of Mother’s Days Mom!

What was the definition of perfect when you grew up? As in, how were you supposed to be? Tell me about a time when you chose brave instead.

---

My forthcoming memoir, Fierce Joy is everything I know about bravery as a woman, a partner, a parent, a leader, an athlete, an activist, and a brainstem tumor survivor. My editors say it’s fast-paced and beautiful and funny. I say, don’t forget that it’s a love story. This is the memoir I’ve been working on in the pre-dawn darkness every day for the past two and half years. It’s about showing up real in life and at work and what gets in the way, namely perfectionism. It’s about love and death and living life to its fullest. It’s about choosing joy over fear and brave over perfect. It’s about looking underneath our fears to find unlimited joy. It’s about how our striving, saving, and performing to do things the “right” way is making it impossible for us to show up real. It’s about how Fear has become a main character in our lives, and a dangerous obstacle to real change.

Somewhere hidden in the pages of Fierce Joy is a description of my homemade Gratitude Goddess. She holds the key to you winning some great prizes! What does my Gratitude Goddess hold in her four hands? If you pre-order the book, you’ll have a head start at finding her and figuring it out! When you answer this question on my website, you automatically enter to win great prizes.

---

My forthcoming memoir, Fierce Joy is everything I know about bravery as a woman, a partner, a parent, a leader, an athlete, an activist, and a brainstem tumor survivor. My editors say it’s fast-paced and beautiful and funny. I say, don’t forget that it’s a love story. This is the memoir I’ve been working on in the pre-dawn darkness every day for the past two and half years. It’s about showing up real in life and at work and what gets in the way, namely perfectionism. It’s about love and death and living life to its fullest. It’s about choosing joy over fear and brave over perfect. It’s about looking underneath our fears to find unlimited joy. It’s about how our striving, saving, and performing to do things the “right” way is making it impossible for us to show up real. It’s about how Fear has become a main character in our lives, and a dangerous obstacle to real change.

“So this is the taste of voicelessness: bitter isolation, acidic futility, burning determination. I took my voice for granted. Never again.”
–from Fierce Joy

---

My forthcoming memoir, Fierce Joy is everything I know about bravery as a woman, a partner, a parent, a leader, an athlete, an activist, and a brainstem tumor survivor. My editors say it’s fast-paced and beautiful and funny. I say, don’t forget that it’s a love story. This is the memoir I’ve been working on in the pre-dawn darkness every day for the past two and half years. It’s about showing up real in life and at work and what gets in the way, namely perfectionism. It’s about love and death and living life to its fullest. It’s about choosing joy over fear and brave over perfect. It’s about looking underneath our fears to find unlimited joy. It’s about how our striving, saving, and performing to do things the “right” way is making it impossible for us to show up real. It’s about how Fear has become a main character in our lives, and a dangerous obstacle to real change.

“Usually, when the topic of using your voice is mentioned, it’s about permission. I feel lucky to be born in a time and place where I am free to speak out. But that doesn’t mean I have always known how to find my voice and how to use it to author my life. For too long, my voice has said what I think a good leader, a good wife, and a good mother should say. I am used to saying someone else’s lines because I don’t trust my own voice to be inspiring enough, calm enough, or wise enough. How could I possibly know what to say?” –from Fierce Joy

---

My forthcoming memoir, Fierce Joy is everything I know about bravery as a woman, a partner, a parent, a leader, an athlete, an activist, and a brainstem tumor survivor. My editors say it’s fast-paced and beautiful and funny. I say, don’t forget that it’s a love story. This is the memoir I’ve been working on in the pre-dawn darkness every day for the past two and half years. It’s about showing up real in life and at work and what gets in the way, namely perfectionism. It’s about love and death and living life to its fullest. It’s about choosing joy over fear and brave over perfect. It’s about looking underneath our fears to find unlimited joy. It’s about how our striving, saving, and performing to do things the “right” way is making it impossible for us to show up real. It’s about how Fear has become a main character in our lives, and a dangerous obstacle to real change.

“What I’ve seen around the world is that once girls discover that their body is theirs, and that their voice is uniquely theirs, they speak up for their rights…When we teach vocal empowerment in Guatemala, the girls are thirteen. They don’t have a sense that their voice, or any part of their body, belongs to them. They don’t look up, and their voices barely rise above a whisper. But when they learn to use their voice to shape their lives, they are unstoppable.”
–from Fierce Joy.

I am on the board of MAIA: Her Infinite Impact because educating girls changes the world. Join me and MAIA on May 5th from 10-12 at the Posner Center in Denver for a short, FREE event that I am facilitating. Enjoy yummy food & drinks from Latin America and great conversation about what it means to choose brave over perfect when the odds are stacked against you. Come meet Lidia, the director of the only female-led, indigenous-led school for girls in all of the Americas.

Can you come?
It’s worth it just to meet Lidia and see her in action! I’d love to see you! Learn more here.

---

---

My forthcoming memoir, Fierce Joy is everything I know about bravery as a woman, a partner, a parent, a leader, an athlete, an activist, and a brainstem tumor survivor. My editors say it’s fast-paced and beautiful and funny. I say, don’t forget that it’s a love story. This is the memoir I’ve been working on in the pre-dawn darkness every day for the past two and half years. It’s about showing up real in life and at work and what gets in the way, namely perfectionism. It’s about love and death and living life to its fullest. It’s about choosing joy over fear and brave over perfect. It’s about looking underneath our fears to find unlimited joy. It’s about how our striving, saving, and performing to do things the “right” way is making it impossible for us to show up real. It’s about how Fear has become a main character in our lives, and a dangerous obstacle to real change.

Praise sunlight,
twelve whole hours of it,
Praise cherry blossoms
Praise Robin’s song
Praise little hands
That point out petals
of crocus and tulip
as we walk barefoot
Praise Spring
for sending up
green shoots
Even when they say it’s going to snow
Even when the odds say don’t,
Even when pavement is being poured,
Spring doesn’t listen to anyone but itself.

---

My forthcoming memoir, Fierce Joy is everything I know about bravery as a woman, a partner, a parent, a leader, an athlete, an activist, and a brainstem tumor survivor. My editors say it’s fast-paced and beautiful and funny. I say, don’t forget that it’s a love story. This is the memoir I’ve been working on in the pre-dawn darkness every day for the past two and half years. It’s about showing up real in life and at work and what gets in the way, namely perfectionism. It’s about love and death and living life to its fullest. It’s about choosing joy over fear and brave over perfect. It’s about looking underneath our fears to find unlimited joy. It’s about how our striving, saving, and performing to do things the “right” way is making it impossible for us to show up real. It’s about how Fear has become a main character in our lives, and a dangerous obstacle to real change.

May is officially the month of Joy. I declare it. I’m even gonna change my name to Susie Wonder for the month, maybe forever. It just makes me happy. Do what makes you happy. This is our only chance to be alive as a human being with language, and with a voice… I learned this the hard way when brain surgery took my speaking voice for 4 months. I don’t want you to have to go through that just to learn that your voice is the instrument that makes the music of your life. Use it.

---

My forthcoming memoir, Fierce Joy is everything I know about bravery as a woman, a partner, a parent, a leader, an athlete, an activist, and a brainstem tumor survivor. My editors say it’s fast-paced and beautiful and funny. I say, don’t forget that it’s a love story. This is the memoir I’ve been working on in the pre-dawn darkness every day for the past two and half years. It’s about showing up real in life and at work and what gets in the way, namely perfectionism. It’s about love and death and living life to its fullest. It’s about choosing joy over fear and brave over perfect. It’s about looking underneath our fears to find unlimited joy. It’s about how our striving, saving, and performing to do things the “right” way is making it impossible for us to show up real. It’s about how Fear has become a main character in our lives, and a dangerous obstacle to real change.